Spiritual Journey · Uncategorized

Petty Preserves

Yes, old life life has been shed and a new life has begun…..

Yet, the petty remains.

It has been preserved.

This jar of petty preserves is more on the salty side though than the sweet.

Last week, while at work, I let my pettiness take lead while theย Holy Spirit took a back seat.

Looking to Webster, petty is defined as “of little importance, trivial”.

Webster is a good source but my working definition is going to be from Urbandictionary.com, which defines petty as “making things normal people dismiss as trivial or insignificant in to excuses to be upset, uncooperative, childish or stubborn.”

The situation that would be deemed insignificant to others yet an excuse to be childish was my supervisor making a generous decision to come in to work early to help the team through a rush while I was out doing a catering delivery. Upon arriving back from the delivery, the supervisor decides to clock out and leave the building until her scheduled time.ย 

Needless to say, we were left hanging during a rush. After that, the supervisor went around and complained to other members of the staff about how the morning team left a mess for her to clean up.ย 

holyspiritblackgirl

After this, my perception of the supervisor as a leader completely changed as well as my attitude towards her. The next day, we didn’t work together.

But those last 2 days working with her……Petty Patty came out to deliver the petty preserves!

When Petty Patty comes out, she comes passive aggressively. The conversation is short and not particularly friendly. Not volunteering help when it was obvious it was needed. Staying to myself. Rolling my eyes. Just a very negative and unprofessional demeanor.

In my mind, I was teaching her a lesson. Showing her that when you just think of yourself, the whole team fails. Also, I justified my actions by saying that she needed to step up in to her leadership so I fell back in my willingness to help.

convictionball

All in all, the focus was on a tit for tat mentality. The focus was on my hurt and not serving my team in the best way possible.

Even with questionable leadership.

Honestly, I went AGAINST my natural reaction to help team members in trouble just so I could teach her lesson. So I could help her to step up in her role. Even more honest? I knew that I was being childish, selfish, prideful….and petty at the time.

Who am I? Who gave me that responsibility?

No one. That was not my role or responsibility.

After a couple days, the conviction came. It came hard. I did nothing to help the supervisor feel comfortable in their role. I not only lashed out on them but the consequences had an effect on co-workers working during that shift as well as the co-workers after the shift.

My actions failed my team in that way. Not the supervisor’s actions.

For 2 days.

How did I show that I was not of this world? How did I show that my actions were different from anyone else’s?

I didn’t.

Apparently after my last shift with the supervisor, there were a couple more rough ones that they weren’t able to handle.

The supervisor decided to part ways with the company.

Even though I knew that this person didn’t have the right personality for the job it wasn’t my job to make that realization for her. My job was to serve their needs at work while God helps them to make that realization.

 

 

 

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